Whenever Wherever
© 2018 P. Arthur Stuart, pastuart.com

Updated June 16, 2018

Note: I was going to name this blog, My Dailies, but I knew I would never make an entry every day, so I thought perhaps, Weeklies, that also failed. I just didn't want to commit myself to, a sort of, rigid schedule. Okay, daily and weekly were out, that leaves monthly and beyond. I realized at this point that my thoughts would most likely be sporadic at best. So, I opted for, Whenever, because this is a pretty open period. The major difference between this and my Currents, which aren't flowing well, is this is about life. Currents are about events.

As I started this Whenever – Whatever Blog, I will use personal examples, unless I know the person I'm referring to won't recognize I was talking about them; or it's a positive example, one they're likely to be proud of. Starting without getting into specifics, I had my share, and maybe some that should have been given to others, of problems with: the government, none criminal type; marital and relationships; job and bosses; and a myriad of other typical ones—like everyone else.


I'm going to start with choice. When I was very young – many, many years ago, I heard this saying, Life makes the soft heart grow hard; and it makes the hard heart grow soft. I think it has to do with what we expect and what we get.

I'm motivated to start with choice because I've been dealing with so many people that choose to dwell on the negative, instead of being positive. We all have had bad things happen to us. And we've also had a lot of good things. I've certainly had my share. The worst being losing my love, after 53 plus years. I'm dealing with it in my own way, a very personal way. I won't say it doesn't still hurt, some of life is learning to live with pain. I can't change it. Nobody else needs to know. I choose to focus on things I can do, that make my life fulfilling—for me it's writing and jogging.

The fact is, life isn't fair; if it were, I'd be handsome, younger, rich, and smart, as would every other male. All females would be beautiful, well built, independently wealthy, and, like they are, smarter than men. But in reality, life isn't unfair either, it's what it is. So, it's our choice on how we choose to live and whether or not to be positive or negative.

I'm not going to say I don't ever talk about these things. Sometimes in conversations, I refer to them when I think they're apropos. Normally I just keep them to myself. In some cases, they were things I couldn't do anything about them. Others I was the totally responsible for and they were a mixed bag. What I can say, is that I learned something from each of them. Unfortunately, many people repeat some of the things because they expect the world to change for them; it usually doesn't.

Here's the choice we have: To be miserable or to live contently, if not happy. I ask myself, literally, ask, "Art, what are you going to do to be happy, or at least, positive?" I've chosen to be positive; and hopefully, be happy at times. I guess I have an advantage over some of the people I've dealt with. My children appear to be concerned about my wellbeing. I can't remember when we had a serious argument. This doesn't mean we agree on everything we just don't fight over things that really matter. This helps me. I guess we have a mutual respect. I'm proud of my kids. I have two personal things in my life that undoubtably help—running, albeit slow, very slow and writing. I write about almost anything. It's like talking to someone that's totally listening, understands, and doesn't argue or disagree.

I've just started this topic, so I need to think some more on it